- Q: What do birds give out on Halloween?
A: Tweets.
- Q: What do goblins drink when there hot and thirsty?
A: Ghoul-aid.
- Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend.
- Q: What happens if you cross a black cat & a lemon?
A: You get a sour-puss.
- Q: What can't you give the headless horseman?
A: A headache.
- Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.
- Q: What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner?
A: The cold shoulder.
- Q: What's a zombie's favorite cold breakfast cereal?
A: Rice Creepies.
- Q: What are the plans of a haunted house called?
A: A boo print.
- Q: What is the most frightful way to travel?
A: By scareplane.
- Q: What do cannibals eat for dessert?
A: Chocolate covered aunts.
- Q: What is a cannibal's favorite game?
A: Swallow the leader.
- Q: Where do cannibals shop for fine furniture?
A: Eatin' Allen's.
- Q: Have you heard about the cannibal restaurant?
A: Dinner costs an arm and a leg.
- Q: How did the glamorous ghoul earn her living?
A: She was a cover ghoul.
- Q: How do you know when your talking to a undertaker?
A: By his grave manner.
- Q: Why did the boy carry a clock & a bird on Halloween?
A: It was for "tick or tweet".
- Q: What do goblin kids do at Halloween?
A: Carve a face on an apple and bob for pumpkins.
- Q: What is the monsters favourite TV sitcom?
A: Fiends.
- Q: Why do demons and ghouls get along so well?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend.
- Q: What do you call a demon who slurps his food?
A: A goblin.
- Q: What do demons have for breakfast?
A: Devilled eggs.
- Q: What do demons have on holiday?
A: A devil of a time.
- Q: Why do demons hang out with ghouls?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend.
- Q: What airline do ghouls fly with?
A: British Scareways.
- Q: Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties?
A: Because there is lots of school spirit.
- Q: What do you call a wizard from outer space?
A: A flying sorcerer.
- Q: Why do goblins wear red, white and blue suspenders?
A: To keep their trousers up.
- Q: What's the first thing a wizard does in the morning?
A: He wakes up.
- Q: What do wizards stop for on the motorway?
A: Witchhikers.
- Q: What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a wizard?
A: Tyrannosaurus hex.
- Q: What do you call a goblin who lies on the floor?
A: Matt.
- Q: What do you call a wizard lying in the gutter?
A: Dwayne.
- Q: What do you call a goblin floating on a barrel?
A: Bob.
- Q: What must a wizard be to receive a state funeral?
A: Dead.
- Q: What kinds of wizards can jump higher than a bus?
A: All of them, busses don't jump.
- Q: What happened when the wizard met the witch?
A: It was love at first fright.
- Q: What happens if you threw eggs at a wizard?
A: He would be egg-sterminated.
- Q: What's it called when your knocked out by Dracula?
A: Out for the count.
- One cannibal says, "Gee, I hate my mother-in-law."
The 2nd replies, "So, try eating something else.
- "Your wife sure makes a good roast said the 1st cannibal."
"Yeah, I'm really going to miss her."
- Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"
- Q: Why did the Cyclops give up teaching?
A: Because he only had one pupil.
- Q: What do you get if you cross a black cat & a lemon.
A: sour-puss.
- Q: What happens when you fail to pay an exorcist?
A: You get repossessed.
- Q: What's the ratio of a pumpkin's circumference?
A: Pumpkin Pi.
- Q: How do you mend a broken Jack-o-lantern?
A: With a pumpkin patch.
- Q: What's black, white, orange, and waddles?
A: A penguin with a jack-o-lantern.
- Q: "Why do you have a sheet on your head, are you a ghost?"
A: "No, I'm an unmade bed !"
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